serendipity

Hm... My days have been interesting and life too. I've been making many changes in my life and trying to be the better person in life. Though I've hit many bumps along the way it's not stopping me from moving forward. I'm tired of holding grudges, yet I am also tired of people taking advantage of me. It's something I have to learn to tell the difference, but it'll never be easy. I've been such a forgiving person lately and though it's healing the cracks in my life, the scars will remain. Not as something to mourn or dwell upon, but as a learning experience. Being positive isn't easy but its a good feeling too at the same time. Creating distractions in my life has been kind of fun knowing that I am doing different things or making alterations with my dull life. Church has been a positive experience too. I've learned a lot about anger and forgiveness, and I feel that I am slowly applying it into my life people don't understand why or how I am becoming the way I am. Though I am getting stressed out more along the lines of school, I keep pushing for the positive feedback. It is an amazing feeling being happy though, I truly mean happy. I feel a lot of weight off my shoulders and I feel so uplifted. I am trying to be organized at the same time but thats almost impossible. I've learned so much in such a short time I finally enjoy it all.

ONE SPECIAL THANKS

MONICA ESPIQUE.
Seriously though thank you so much. I don't understand how you can listen to me complain, nag, cry, resent, bitch, and etc. about so much it's so amazing. I know we don't hang out that much as we did during Summer but we do talk/text a lot about stupid/interesting things, and hang out when it is possible. Like CUE! Such a fun day and winning toad was fun too! =] I am thankful to have you as a really really close friend. Thanks for the support, love, and thoughtfulness you've given me. Why Men Love Bitches is still a pondering thought in my mind whether or not it works. O.o I know I can trust you with my words esp. if I sound so hateful or vice versa. But like I said I got your back no matter what I'll help you out like you've helped me out. I'm sorry if sometimes I am never helpful with your questions or needs but I do try to assist as much as I could. I can't wait to work on your choir final =] Bwahaha who would've thought I'd be singing in those again hahahahahaha. OH mans. But seriously babygirl. This is barely the beginning of everything cause there is so much more ahead of us right now we don't even know it. oh yah. ENJOY!


ps. (you know who you are)
I do miss you, and you've inspired me to search for happines not within people but in myself. For once I can say I'm starting to feel the change within me. I know everything between is nothing guaranteed but I am uplifted to say I am okay with it. I remember what I did say to you in the car, but I'm not sure if I meant it. I know the past will sometimes be painful, but I learned from it and I can move on. I love you with all my heart. I am proud to say I am happy. However you plan on staying in my life... I'm just happy that you're still here for me and remaining in it. Best Friend or Lover... it doesn't matter to me much. You're still receiving true love from me because I don't let good people go. If you see pain within me, please don't worry. It's life. We hurt, we cry, we love, we hate. No matter how deep the cut is... in time we eventually heal.